yay!
i finished shoveling.
And i made a big pile so that me and my sister can dig out a fort later.
w00t.
i'm out.
peace!
girlie let loose @
3:27 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
must... go... shovel... blah.
{music: radio}
You know what's fun refreshing? Blogging. Posting. Whatever you want to call it. It's so much easier to type it all out than to try and write it in a diary or a journal. I find when i type, the words just flow, they don't stop. I can type and type and type once i get going. Agh. Fuck. Unless, like now for instance, my fingers are being uncoordinated and making it very difficult for me to acheive tha flow of which i speak. Boy i can't wait until i'm going to be graded on my typing skills in tech. That should be - um - interesting. Yes, that's the word for it. Interesting.
Anyway, i had a wonderful night last night, never had so much fun at the movies. I hope you all enjoy yourselves at Marmot. Looks like it's just you and me Michael! We're gonna have a blast and you know it!! Hey! I heard that sarcasm! *glares* Just kidding!! lol.
I'm a little hyper. ooooh, they're playing Waterfalls by TLC on the radio. Funny, just yesterday i was hoping they'd play this song. yay!
Anyways, i'm being stupid, i should be out shoveling the walk.
ooh my hair looks so cool right now. I spent an hour crimping it yesterday. Elya almost died when she saw me wearing liquid eyeliner. She was so proud. lol. *is proud of self*
I'm gonna go and shovel. Burn some cals right? lol...
Peace.
girlie let loose @
11:55 AM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Wednesday, January 29, 2003
*feels like shit*
{music: radio}
oookay. I fucked up. yes, i was slightly ticked, but i shouldn't have wigged out. Believe me, i'm sorry. I just - arg. I'll talk to you about this.
On a lighter note, i'm going out with Jer to see The Ring tonight. That should be fun.
i have nothing more to say at the moment. I'm just going to leave.
girlie let loose @
5:31 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Tuesday, January 28, 2003
it's all a paradox.
{Music: Avril cd}
mmmkay. 3...2...1... blast-off.
WHAT THE FUCK??? I am so fucking pissed off right now. Who the hell do you think you are? I thought you were my friend but apparently i'm quite sadly mistaken. That makes me even more fucking angry. I know it's shallow but guess what? I FUCKING HATE BEING WRONG. what the shit?? This is so... inexplicable. I can't even begin to describe the amount of rage i am currently filled with. You know, i always suspected you were making that stuff up, but i believed it anyways, because i trusted you. Guess i can't do that anymore either, huh? The really funny part about this is you'll never know who you are, because i'll treat you exactly the same. And you'll think i know nothing, but i figured it out. You weren't careful enough and i found you. Too bad you weren't smart enough to cover your tracks hm? How long has that been there?? Why didn't you tell me? I have never, in my entire life, kept something from you. You were the single person i told everything. And you threw that in my face by lying about me too.
I guess you thought you were safe if i didn't know where to find you, but i've got skills i bet you never knew existed. I found you, and it took me all of 30 seconds.
I always encouraged you, i never put you down, and i was always there right by your side to stand up for you and shoot down anyone who, for one moment, took away your glow. Why'd you lie about me? Is she that important to you? You need her comfort that badly? Big mistake, i won't forget this one soon.
On another note, i love the rest of you, you're great. I had a really shitty day yesterday except for the fact that i finally met steph and i got to hang out with Ash and Jack for a while... mmm fries taste so much better when they're free! lol. Kory didn't show up. Jerk. I'll yell at him later, tho i'm sure he's got a good excuse.
I got my pictures developed... there's one that Elya took of me and Jeremy, it's so cute. That one's goin' on the wall or in the locker, haven't decided yet. He has such gorgeous eyes... anyways.
[he can fucking drive! Fuck! Piss off already.]
Later.
girlie let loose @
5:30 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Sunday, January 26, 2003
great weekend.
{music: Everlast - What It's Like}
I hope all of you read my quizzes... but if not... meh.
I had such a great weekend. Friday night was half a bust and yet half absolutely amazing. i went snowboarding with Jack on Saturday... and it was so much fun. I wanna do it again. Except for the fact that my back muscles are KILLING me. I think it's from falling on my ribs so much, twisting my back at wierd angles, and falling off the T-Bar. (but i've got it now!!) Jack is sucha good teacher. Seriously, yo. I couldn't have done it without you, hun! Saturday evening was spent at the mall with Jeremy and Elya, followed by a staff meeting, followed by a pizza party at Pizza Hut for 3 hours... and it would have gone on longer had Mike not called and said "i'm picking you up. I'll be there in 10 minutes". Doug's back on my good side. He's so fucking cool when he's not around his asshole friends trying to impress them. Me, Jeremy, Elya and Doug played Blackjack, War and Go Fish almost the whole time we were at Pizza Hut. It was great. Today, i spent 5 hours at the mall. Bought jeans and a magazine and sat with Jeremy on his break. had lots and lots and lots of fun. Tried to shop for bathing suits. Realized i hate my abs. Resorted to being happy with my one-piece until those 'tummy tucks' start actually taking effect.
Tomorrow i'm going to meet Steph S. at the mall to exchange money for Waterpark tickets. Finally. I mean, i've known her for 2 years and this will be the first time we meet. Also, Kory is meeting me at 4 and i'm still in discussion with my boy to see how early i can convince him to come and hang out with me. Considering the distaste he has for the mall, that could be a tough debate. I've got a good card to use though. Let's see if it works. *waits for 10:00 so Jeremy will be home.*
Brian. I'm not sure what to say to you. Let's put it this way. The first thing i am gonna do tomorrow morning when i see you is give a great big hug. I hope you enjoyed the Superbowl. I also hope you weren't hoping for Oaklahoma to win. Cause i didn't see the end, but from what i did see, they weren't looking so hot. And keep those devious plans coming... i don't even think anyone suspects... bwahahahha!! *ahem* sorry... lol.
Jarrah!! Serena came through. Oh it's great to have connections. I really hope this works, because that would be so amazing.
Anywhos. Early bedtime for me. Gotta focus for the exam eh? *grins* yeah, sure, whatever.
Luv y'all.
*kisskiss*
girlie let loose @
10:02 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Wednesday, January 22, 2003
Hellloooooo.
{music: radio - Carson's most requested}
How is everyone? Good, i hope. Just to let you know, i posted a whole bunch of quizzes on my other site. The link is called "Breathe free!" under "my other babies" on the side bar there -----> so check it out.
oooh it's so exciting, this waterpark thing is working out even better than i thought it would. I'm so glad that you're all coming. I told Steph i'd need about 25 tix and she almost had a heart attack... but she was thrilled. I'd encourage all of you to go see the play in April too.
why do you hate me so fucking much? It doesn't make any sense, i've done nothing to you and yet you treat me like dirt. Did you think i was including you because i wanted to? Oh hell no. The only reason i brought you in was because i don't believe in burning bridges. I might need you some day. And no, don't worry, if you're reading this blog, it's not you i'm talking about.
I should sleep. So check out my quiz results... and then if you want to comment on them... do it here, because i'm too lazy to put a commenting system on my other one... some other time. blahgshdk haflkhjasdf. english exam tomorrow. need. sleep. g'night.
girlie let loose @
11:48 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Tuesday, January 21, 2003
schizo like a fox!
Music: Power 92... w00t.
I hope you all are joining me at the WaterPark on February 23rd... i need money by friday!! hehe. Yes. Give me money. *grins*
I realized something about myself today. I'm a schizo. And i'm a fucking good one too. *wink*
Here's the thing. In my psychotic attempt to do the impossible, i've created a personality for each of you, my buds. While there's always a common thread, i mean, i AM Jen-Jen, i'm sure if you took the careful time to observe, you'd notice differences in the way i act around and treat each of my friends. Apparently 'everyone' likes me, and while i know that's not possible, maybe some of them just fake it, i really like who i am. Every one of me...
It's time for me to brag. One of my best friends, i'll keep her unnamed, always tells me what she loves about me. One such thing was "Jen, i don't what it is about you, but i love you. I love everything about you! How do you stay so bubbly and happy after the beatings you take? I can be having the worst day of my life, and i see you and you give me a hug and it's all good!" She makes me smile. You know what i told her? "It's seeing you that makes me so happy! It's a paradox, we cure each other." Did i say that because i thought that was what she wanted to hear? Fuck no. But the person i am around her reflects a lot of her traits, that's one of the big things. I adapt and borrow traits from my friends when i'm creating their personal Jen. I love her too, and i have a feeling we'll be best friends forever, thanks to a few other handy coincidences. Another of my friends said told me that i changed a guy's life. He cleaned up his act, stopped doing some bad stuff that i didn't approve of. I happen to be really good friends with this girl and guy too, and have adapted some of their traits too, which i bear proudly. Now you may be asking yourself, if she's different around each person, then who is she when she's in a crowd? Again, a new character, a neutral character. You wonder who i really am? The only way to find my base is to stick me in a room with an audience of every person i've ever met, and ask me to make a statement. I thank you all so dearly for the qualities you've inspired me with. The person i am is a little piece of each of you. I am a true schizo.
And it's great fun. Like I said to Courtenay, the quote about it being impossible to please everyone is true, but if i'm affecting so many people in a good way, then it can't be all bad, right?
Ok, now that i've finished being all 'i'm so great' even tho i don't really think that, i'll go on...
I haven't listened to my favorite song in far too long.
There will never come a day,
you will ever hear me say
that i want, or need, to be
without you.
Heehee, my mcd is online!! He makes me laugh so hard.. i miss him i tell ya.
Anyways, i should sleep sometime tonight. Not now, but i'm out anyways.
Kisskiss.
girlie let loose @
10:39 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Monday, January 20, 2003
wayo.
Listening to: The Eminem Show
Agh, i'm fed up with my stupid fucking keyboard. So happy i own a laptop and i can use this keyboard instead.
I had a pretty great night. Spent 5 hours with my soulmate... and Ber, boy i got a tidbit for you honey. Then i got home and did my english... what a downer, but fuck it it's done, and done really (yeah, right) moderately well.
Liking my music, Eminem is good for the rage factor. It's 11:30 though and i want to sleep so this is all for now. I've had some realizations. Gotta simmer on them for a while before i post about them.
Goodnight my darlings.
P.S. Brian, i'm sorry, but i'll never say it. hehehehe... Jarrah: he did it again!!!
girlie let loose @
11:35 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Friday, January 17, 2003
Coolio.
Music: Rock Superstar. Yes. Again. *drools*
So i'm reading blogs right? And Cork, i hadn't been to the glycerin one in a bit, so i checked it out. Lots to read there, i like the new layout... only thing was it was hard to read so i had to highlight it all... could just be cause my eyes hurt like hell tho... lol. i was really interested in what you had to say about me, and i completely agree with it. I'm loud and opinionated, but it's true, there are times that i keep my trap shut... in the presence of, oh let's just say 'certain people'. I do so because:
a) They're my parents.
b) They're powerful people who run gangs and who i need on my side.
c) I don't know them well enough to judge proper reactions.
Maybe that seems like a lot of people, but really, when i make a list, it's pretty short. As Erika told me the other day, "Jen, i think people open up to you because you're just so brutally honest. It's so hard to lie to someone who is so straightforward." And i took it as a compliment. Maybe i do get penalized for it, but i don't really panic about it. If i'm honest, even cruelly so, it's because:
a) I have too much respect for them to ever lie hold back.
b) You piss me off, and i really don't care whether or not you agree with what i say, in fact, i hope you don't agree. It's more fun for me that way. (Although that's rare. If i'm really mad, i probably just won't talk at all)
c) We know each other well enough that if i wasn't honest, you'd know anyways. So what's the point?
d) I'm proud of the way i feel.
It's true, i speak my mind. When people notice that, it doesn't offend me in the least. I won't ever hide anything from you. Like i said, the list of people i'm subtle with goes down to about 2 people. In fact here's the list: My mom, and my mike. In other words, my parents. So to completely change subjects... i have a not so hot relationship with my parents. And yeah, i wanna get it off my chest cause fuck i need to breathe. I entitled this blog "Are you worthy? Of course you are." But sometimes i wonder if i'm worthy of them. They do so much for me, and i appreciate it, but it's just so cold. It's so goddam cold. My mom and i barely even talk any more. Sometimes i feel like she doesn't like me a whole lot. But i can't explain it. And plus, it's my problem, i'll work it out.
I gotta get some sleep. (i love you baybee.)
Goodnight all!
[i'd make a damn good wife.]
girlie let loose @
10:29 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Thursday, January 16, 2003
Oh how i love posting!
Music: You can't take me - Uncle Kracker (for as long as i can stand it...)
I love posting. Makes me feel so cleansed. I can talk anything i want and i can think about how i want to say it, so i don't sound stupid... or at least i don't feel stupid when i'm writing it.
A lot of bad shit's been going down lately and i finally got sick of it, so i stopped caring. Just for a week, to see how it felt.
Music changes to: Burnt cd - Kelly Osbourne - Papa don't preach
I discovered that it was really hard. But it felt so fucking good to just let it all go. Of course, certain things, i just couldn't let go, but those are for me to be concerned about. It was mostly the rifts and petty arguments that i was involved in that i decided to neglect.
Music change: Burnt cd - Craig David - I'm Walking Away
The great part was that i was more effective when i just didn't care. The people i was arguing with were more respectful of me if i didn't talk to them. But the same shit happens day after day. do i talk to them about it? no. I tried that. They just don't listen. They'll be sorry sometime. They'll wish i hadn't become such a
Music change: Burnt cd - Gob - I hear you calling
bitch. But you know what? I'm not like that by nature. Stupid people make me mean. Yes i'm blaming them. I hate fools. The good part is, i'm not a bitch to everyone. You take care of me, i take care of you. And believe me, i take good care. Just watch how i treat my good friends. I thank you all, the wonderful people in my life, for helping me smile!
Wruv you babeeees!
girlie let loose @
9:29 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Wednesday, January 15, 2003
Damn right.
Music: Rock Superstar - Cypress Hill
You know damn right! oh man, good stuff. (You kicked my dog)
Right.
So yeah, i'm not tired. I'm wired, but i'm worried. I tried to call her, but no one is home. I'm so scared, i hope she's ok.
Notice a few more changes to my site? Everything's centered, and i finally got an imood thing. I've been meaning to do that for ages. Now you'll always know how i feel.... even though i usually write about my feelings anyways.
Courtenay, this is important. Don't believe that shit. You know her better than that. You can't trust the other one. Don't do something you might regret. I know this is my strong dislike speaking but it's also my logic. Go with what you know.
Mike, your hair is sweet. I gotta admit, i love it. The floppiness was always cool. Good luck with the doctor's appointment, i hope everything checks out ok. Thanks for the puffed wheat too, it was nummy.
Brian, thanks for the croissant - meat thing. Delicious. I should really start bringing a lunch, eh? I hope you bought something good with the $1.08!
Regarding my last post, i feel i must elaborate. I wasn't always the way i've always described myself to you, as an athiest. I've discovered that i was more of an agnostic. A few days ago, i started thinking about what i believed in. Now you may not want to hear this, it's kinda corny, but i'm gonna say it, so skip ahead if you want. Abtou 4 or 5 years ago i went to a catholic camp where they put on little plays about the good people who would go to heaven. I was a little believer and i loved them. On the last day of camp the skit featured what happens to people who don't accept God into their hearts. They go to hell, and they can't warn their loved ones and they don't get a second chance, and the torture never ends. You burn. Forever. I was, what? 10, maybe 11 years old. I started crying. I was so scared, and i hated it. I told my mom about it, and somewhere along the drive back from camp, i stopped believing. I hated the idea of being scared. I hated it. I was scared out of my fucking mind. People ask me how i can be so terrified of death. I always will be. Maybe it's because i'm afraid of pain, i don't know, but it's not really the point. Until just recently, i'd always convinced myself that when you die, that's it. There's no heaven, there's no hell. We don't have spirits, we just don't exist anymore. But i couldn't believe that anymore. I had a long talk with a friend that i trust a lot. She helped me figure out why i was so confused. Why i didn't know what to believe. I just felt so - exalted afterwards. And i prayed, and it felt so good. Now one thing hasn't changed, and probably never will. I do not believe in the bible. I do not believe in all the opinions and teachings that it represents. My religion is simple. There's a higher being, and he (or she. or it for that matter.) is compassionate, and cares about me, and i'm never alone. That's it. I will never push any religion of any kind onto anyone else. I hate that. I just wanted to tell the world, because i'm so happy that i don't have to think about it anymore.
Well, that's about it for me. I'll talk to you guys later! Anyone who feels like coming to Southgate with me tomorrow... i love company!!
muah. check you later!
girlie let loose @
6:51 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Tuesday, January 14, 2003
Bet you never saw it coming.
Music: Moulin Rouge Soundtrack
Last night before i went to bed, i did something.
I prayed.
girlie let loose @
7:50 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Saturday, January 11, 2003
No more import beer!
Music: OLP - Gravity album
ewwww... i feel so... gross. Bottle drives are not cool. Believe me, the day involved being around drunk people, smoking people, old people, "blind" and "deaf" people (sure, sure, right Jarrah?), and college boys who like porn.
Let's recap. I hope you find this funny, i'm finding it easier to laugh about it now that it's over...
Ok, so we start out, 9:00 AM. Who in their right minds would be awake at this hour?? Luckily, most of the houses seem to be inhabited by seniors. They all wake up at unnaturally early hours anyway, right? So we're making a good haul. Me and Nicole dealt with a drunk guy who probably gave us $15 worth of expensive liquor bottles that we had to pry from the ice behind his house. Seriously. At least he was nice enough to give us a couple of garbage bags to put the bottles in. Me and Jarrah also encountered a drunk man who invited us into his house to collect the stuff. He had a huge cabinet of mostly pop bottles and juice boxes. I'm just relieved that Jarrah called me over to help her so she wasn't in his house alone... scary. The worst one, however, i was alone for. I ring the doorbell and this college-age guy answers the door, and says i can stand just inside the door while he runs to grab the bottles. So i step inside and almost immediately faint from the stench of... i don't know, it was like old piss or something, it was disgusting, but the air is teeming with it. I can barely breathe, cause i feel like i'm gonna be sick. So i look over to this wall, and SURPRISE!! My eyes are greeted with a massive wall collage of pictures from some Playboy magazine. That's exactly what i need on a Saturday morning. Piss and porn. woo. party. Finally he comes back up with a box of beer bottles and i say thanks and stumble out, gasping for air. ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew. Thank you very much, sir for making me remember what all (or most) teenage boys turn into when they live on their own. That's great.
Then Jarrah tells me this story about some guy who listened to her little speech and then said "I'm sorry, i can't help because i'm blind and i can't hear you. Riiiight. He heard the doorbell, and somehow found his way to the door, but yes, he's blind.. which for some reason causes him to not hear properly. Meh, hey, for all i know, he was. But still, fishy story.
Once we finished the route, we went back to the depot and spent another hour finishing the sorting. I was the queen of glass sorting... woo! Bad part was, my gloves smell like booze now. It's disgusting. I don't drink for a reason. yuck, i need to wash those. lol, it's like my mom warned me, sorting is dirty work.
Enough about that ordeal, i hope your days went well. I hope you spent them indoors because it's bloody cold out. And all you people!! What's up with this no posting business??? You'd better get on that. *g*
Well, i'm gonna go look up more hotel stuff for the band trip... yay. On a side note, in case anyone was curious, me made about $612.... i think that's what it was... close to that anyways.
Bye for now!
girlie let loose @
4:21 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Friday, January 10, 2003
Wheeeee!
Listening to: take a wild guess. Rock...SUPERSTAR!
Oh man. A little piece of advice to all of you!! DO NOT. I repeat, DO NOT maximise the writing with the A+ button until the button disappears from your screen. Refresh will not reset it. Closing your web browser and opening a new one will not reset it. Perhaps restarting the computer will help, but otherwise, you will not be able to view my site. No scrolling button will appear so that you can scroll over and find the button. Brian knows. He tried it, and now he can't see my blog on his brother's computer... lol, thanks for the heads up Brain! Let me know if anything changes!
I liked my hair today. I dried it in 7 minutes this morning... that's a record time!! w00t! Anywho, i think i might just dye it on my own on Saturday anyways... we'll see. Cork, good luck with your games, it's too bad our plans didn't work out.
*ADVERTISING*
Everyone listen up!!
On February 23rd, 2003 the World Waterpark has been rented out for the use of any and all people who wish to attend from 6 to 9 for only $5!! Yes, that's right, i said $5. You can't buy tickets at the door (as far as i know) Steph S. has the tickets, if you want some, let me know and me and Steph will arrange an exchange of money and tickets! Invite everyone you know, this is for a good cause. Her school is presenting FOOTLOOSE in April, so they're raising money. E-mail me if you need more info! We need participators! Anyone can come, bring your family, friends, cousins, it doesn't matter. It'll be a serious blast. Be there or be square, yo.
So yeah, come.
But hey, i gotta go research some shtuff for Mme. Bujold. Band Trip y'all. wooooo!!! I hope Brian is coming... and i hear that Dave is probly coming too??? cool. The more the merrier!
Sweet, well, i'll check y'all later.
girlie let loose @
6:07 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Thursday, January 09, 2003
Why do i feel so... shleeeeepy?
Music: Rock superstar... again.
So, yeah, i....
Am about to collapse in my chair, i am so fecking tired. Normally i'd say i don't know why i'm sleepy, but that would be lying. I know why i'm tired. Because i was up late with my b'bay on the phone last night. No, not that late, but christ i need more sleep than the average Jarrah. I don't know how she does it. I go to bed earlier and get up later and i'm still dragging my ass around all day. meh, it gives me a good excuse to wear a scarf. My yellow fleecy scarf... yay! You have no idea how good it feels to wake up in the morning and put on a hoodie and a scarf and feel dressed up. Or maybe you do know... i look at myself, not trying to be thin or pretty or any of that stuff. No special makeup, plain lip balm that smells like menthol or something, and it's kinda sparkly. I know i don't, but I'm completely comfortable and i think to myself, Jen, you look hot. And then i make my way out the door and on my way to the bus stop. Some mornings that's the only thing that keeps me going.
I'm not depressed or anything, no way, it's the complete opposite. I am so happy with my life. i mean, of course there are about a thousand things that i would change if i could, but i can live with what i've got, i'm thankful for the good stuff i do have.
My morning pep thoughts basically consist of me going over the things i love about me. I mean, it's not like a mantra or something, it's just the thoughts that go through my mind when i look in the mirror after the initial signs of fatigue have disappeared from under my eyes. I love the color of my eyes, and i love the way my face squinches up when i smile. But enough about that. I suppose it just came to mind because i'm so tired, which made me think of sleeping, which made me think of getting up in the morning... and so on...
I really really want to talk, but i'm not sure to who.
Something amazingly uplifting happened to me last night, and i just have to talk about it because it made me so happy. I was talking to Jeremy on the phone last night and he said, "You know what me and Kory figured out? You are the coolest chick in the whole world. Kory came up to me last night and he said, 'Dude, your chick is the coolest chick in the world', and i said 'I know! And i'm going out with her!' and he said 'she has such a great personality' and i said 'i know! And i'm going out with her!!' and he said 'you know what it is? She's just like us.' And i said 'yeah, but a female version!' " It was great, i couldn't stop smiling, and then, i fell asleep in under the average 7 minutes, which is nuts because i'm a stressball and i usually don't fall asleep for at least an hour. But it seems when i have nothing to worry about, or am completely content, i fall asleep so quickly. Which i'm guessing is good for me, because that means i'm getting more sleep. Now i just have to make sure these calming phone conversation occcur before 11:30...
girlie let loose @
4:57 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Wednesday, January 08, 2003
Feelin' so good. mmm, sexy music.
Listening to: (rock) superstar - Cypress Hill
Duuuuudes!
hehe, i had to!
anwhos. I'm sure you've all noticed the massive renovations that occured here. At least i hope you noticed... *sobs*
You've all gotta try the cool buttons over there------->
The A+ button makes the text get bigger, you can click it as many times as you want... i haven't tried to see how far it'll go... The A- button does the opposite... haven't fully tested that one either. Also, you can change the font, and chose if you want the links to open new windows or not. One more cool effect... (as if it weren't already enough!!) You'll perhaps notice that the site gradually changes colors on it's own... very l337. hehehe... w00t!!!
Yeah, so i'm going to my cousin's shindig. Yes i cancelled the date. No, i'm not going to literally shoot myself... aie.
I talked to Nada today, i haven't seen her in forever. It was so good to talk to her again!!! We reminisced about Arby's and such. good times.
So anywho... i should, you know, do something productive. The time spent changing my site SHOULD have been spent doing my research paper... woops! heeheehee. meh. Omg! Kory cut his hair!! It was so long and now it's so.... short!! wow. it was a shock, i almost fell over... j/k, i luyoooo! *sighs* good times. I miss those good times. I was talking to Jeremy about some of the sw33t ass times we had last summer. Gawd i miss those days. Maybe i can get them back... then again, maybe i should just make new ones, eh?
Night folks!
girlie let loose @
9:52 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Tuesday, January 07, 2003
The promised bitch-out is here!!
Listening to: GLAY - Kanojo
What's a happenin', yo?
hehe, ok, i promised it, and yes! Here it is...
Drama. is. stupid.
Oh hell yes. Some of you will know exactly what i speak of. I can only hope to god that i don't have to act like prairie grass (no offense Dave, you make *great* grass!) every class until the semester ends... or be any other plant life for that matter. I don't want to be born, i don't want to push my way out from inside an egg, and no. i do not want to do the pimp dance. I mean, jesus, normally i'd be all hyper and be saying stuff like "wee! I get to spend an entire class acting like a fool!! Join me! It's great fun!" But, you know what it is? It's Laurin. She's just so... mousy?? i'm sorry, i hate to be mean but she pisses the hell outta me.
Like seriously, usually when she comes up with a project that the entire class is hating, we can shoot it down enough so that she just abandons it. But i guess this is an actual module. Damn. only 6 or 7 classes left!! The thing is, i have her next semester too... social. yay! my two *favorite* things! BLAH. I think i'm gonna hurl.
Anyways! On to bigger and better things! Like the upcoming friday night!!
I'm supposed to go to a mooooovie, but now i'm finding out my cousin's having some kind of going away party or something... oh man, i love my cousin, but if i have to cancel on Jeremy again i am going to shoot myself.
Well, i hope you all are doing just dandy. I'm off to... be lazy. lol, see you tomorrow!
girlie let loose @
5:25 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Monday, January 06, 2003
Hi!
First things first, i fixed my Wrin Rants link. Turns out i typed the url in with "http://" twice. woops! anyways, now it's all good.
Second things second, Jer and Cork? Plans for dye fest are looking good! Have you people talk to my people... or just, you know, talk to me at school or something... lol.
Third things third, i got to yell at *Bob (lol) today. I was very proud of myself, i called him a fuck. Then, after i got into work, i found out he actually lied to me again. to my face. while i was yelling. stupid FUCK! I didn't even hit him and i am now regretting that. *Jason is gonna beat him for me tho... what a nice boy.
On another note, i was supposed to train Kory today but that didn't turn out, i guess Ron and Mark decided not to teach him the front... alrighty then!! whatever, i really don't care i am so emotionally drained. (as Jeremy would say. and usually, i reply, emotionally drained, or emotionally scarred? Both, he says. lol It seems we have the same discussions over and over. short ones where each word is pre-determined and every now and then i'll change something just to throw him off... but he hardly ever falters... just makes up something new, and suddenly, we have a new inside joke! it's great. But wait. How did i get talking about Jeremy again??...)
And no, Cork i was not high when i last posted... i mean, come on! Me? High? Funny story though, i see so much weed every day now, you'd think i was getting in on a bad crowd. I walk around with these people, and it feels like the cops are gonna jump out and arrest me any time... lmao. I worry too much. Meh, i'm not actually that concerned.
Well, i'm out. I'll speak to each and every one of you later! hehe...
girlie let loose @
10:43 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Sunday, January 05, 2003
I wish i was sleepy...
Listening to: some guy singing "just bust-a-move!" too disoriented to figure out who... Hey all. I'm getting no sleep here, so i'm posting! weeeee! ^_^
Hey Ber!
Thanks for - everything.
I think i've got my solution. A slap in the face for one, and an important discussion with the other. Plus me and two other victims have to hunt the rest of em' down and KICK EM'!!! I think we've successfully kick and runned... 4 of them. only... 16 or so to go... potheads. yeesh. lol.
heehee...
ok, wow, now i *am* tired.
Hey! now he's singing something about letting your backbone slide... power 92! wtf are you playing?? This reminds me of michael. (Don't make me bust-a-move!) lmoa.
aright. sleepy time now. goodnight moon!
P.S. the song was Maestro - let your back bone slide... they just told me...
girlie let loose @
12:55 AM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Saturday, January 04, 2003
I feel so accomplished!
Listening to: Anime - Rurouni Kenshin - The war of the last wolves
Morning! haha, fooled you, it's 6:38! heehee...
Anyways, i did lots of scripting today, so check out the additions to my website. The "Are you Worthy?" link is a work in progress, so right now it'll simply take you to some webpage i haven't even bothered to look at. Any comments or suggestions, or if you think it's worse... *sobs*, I'd love to hear it!
Chat at y'all later.
girlie let loose @
6:44 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
b00m! goes Friday, January 03, 2003
Stupid you!
Listening to: The Gorillaz - Clint Eastwood
*names have been changed
Oh my god, that supid, stupid boy. He promised me! He said, "Jen, as my New Year's resolution to you, i promise not to smoke anything. Anything at all. I was thinking about you when i decided that, Jen."
And what did i say to him? "That's good Bob*, that's great. But you know, you better stick to that. Cause believe me, if you are smoking, i will know. I'll find out."
"I know," he says, "i know."
I was so pissed at him the day before, and i woke this morning thinking, next time i see Bob, i'm going to encourage him. I'll say, "Bob, i'm really proud of you for making a huge commitment like that, and i want you to know that i'll be there if you ever need my help to control yourself, or help with anything else for that matter" except with less cheese, more toughness, y'know?
Then Elya tells me she saw him last night smoking weed with a bunch of other guys, a lot of which i know. I was stunned, but i don't doubt her story for one second. I'm thinking, "Bob, you asshole. I believed you! How stupid could i have been to believe you?"
I called Jeremy tonight, and apparently Bob came back tonight. Waited two and a half hours for Jason* and Tom* to get off work so that they could have a reenactment. What the hell am i gonna do?? Stay out of it? Is it none of my business? Should i just sever any ties i hold with Bob and forget him? But it's so sad. Bob used to be so innocent. And where do i put Jason in all of this? Jason's my brother! My homie. But seriously, he makes me smile every time i'm pissed. I could talk to Jason for hours and not get bored. He's so friendly! I haven't even known him that long and yet he tells me the things that could get him in more trouble than i can even begin to imagine. I've known all along what Jason does, but i never got mad at him for it. Maybe because he was honest with me about it. Maybe it was because i was naturally inclined to like Jason, because he has ties within my other friends, and Bob doesn't. In fact, Bob was shunned before i even met him. Is it fair, then, to accept Jason's behaviour, and not Bob's? Why do i even ask, no it's not fair, but i do it anyways. Jason has that same quality as Michael. A lot of you will know exactly what i mean. He's impossible not to like. Sure, he makes you mad every now and then, but you take a lot more shit from him than from anyone else, and you forgive him so quick. I'm not saying that Michael gets away with a whole bunch either, he doesn't dish out a whole lot of crap. I'm jsut saying that he has the ability to do it. If that makes any sense...
Anyways, i need advice, so if you have anything to say, i'm so willing to hear it. And i don't know how good i am at not giving out details, but if any of you know exactly who i'm talking about, don't say anything, i probably shouldn't even have written that down, but it's majorly stressing me out.
I hope you all are having good holidays! I have to do my homework tomorrow... aie.
G'night all!
girlie let loose @
11:18 PM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
W'sup?
Listening to: Oldies - I just died in your arms tonight
mmm, good music, thanks for sending that, Michael.
I hope everyone is doing just grand! I'm alright, but i'm getting worried about this homework. The main thing i have left to work on is me earnest questions... gotta develop them some more and plan an essay for each. Also, that stupid author report. Courtenay you're an angel! I would have competely forgotten about that if i hadn't seen it in your blog!! much love sent your way, darlin'. Bah, i'll probably be finishing it Sunday night... aie.
I have to work today, from 11 to 3. I should start getting ready - soon. Elya and Diana are coming to meet me at 3 cuz they both work at 5, so i'm gonna chill with them for an hour or so before i go home.
We had our family portraits done yesterday! I had to rush home from work, get all pretty and such, and then rush back to the mall. We went to Sears. And actually, i'm not that disappointed, the pictures are pretty good! yay!
Gawd, i love this song. How did he know?? HOW did he know??
Oh man, i'm getting all stressed out about my druggies again. I found out that one of them is selling, big time, and he's selling them to people that i know. That's bad. I'm so scared, i don't know what to do! I tried telling him to stop it, but so far, all he's promised is to stay away from Jeremy. That's one good thing, at least. It's not Jer that i'm worried about, i don't think he'll do that stuff, he knows i hate it. But seriously, do these people not understand that what they're doing is illegal? I guess that's not a big deal to some people. How can a 15 or 16 year-old be a criminal? That's so sad! I got an e-mail from one of my friends in Hinton that i haven't talked to for ages, she wrote the e-mail while she was drunk. She went out to a new year's eve party, got drunk and started making out with some guy she normally hates, and now they're dating. She came home piss drunk with a hickey on her neck, and her parents just laughed. Ok, then, i guess it's just me.
Anywho, i really do have to get ready for work, so i'm gone.
girlie let loose @
9:16 AM | Baby, you make me precipitate.
.bio.
You can call me Lyra. I've got brown hair, blue eyes, and psychotic tendancies.
Currently, my favorite song is You and Me (cover) by Simple Plan, my favorite
movie is Kill Bill, my favorite book is 1984 by George Orwell, and i'm
feeling .
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